Monday, September 22, 2008

Marriage, Ministry, and Mentoring

This subject has been very much on my heart. Many times it is difficult for the ministry couple to get a good grasp on these three words...marriage, ministry, and mentoring. We can get them all out of order and it is hard to get them back the way God intended them in the first place.

There are going to be those women...and men, who were called to ministry before they were married. Then, there are those who were were called after they were married. It doesn't matter when you were called, you still have to keep the priorities of doing life straight and in the correct order...

1 - Marriage, before that is your own relationship with God of course.
2 - Ministry
3 - Mentoring

In this post I would like to look at point one and two. Let's take a look at the women and men who were called before they were married. Now, if you have been in ministry a while you have become accustomed to ministering as a single. You have done things on your own and not had to think about a second person. Now things are different. There are two of you and you BOTH have to think of the other person.

If you were called after marriage there are different issues to consider. For one, you both need to be listening for God's voice. This way when one is called the other is spiritually ready to join in the call.

In each of these situations BOTH people need to understand the other person's calling. Talk things over and ask the Holy Spirit to help you work the issues out, so that the decision brings glory to God. There are too many women who start sensing the call of God on their lives and put that before their marriage and children. God cannot be glorified in a messed up marriage.

When God calls the woman to ministry He will help her balance her husband, her children and her ministry. At the same time, the husband needs to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit and release the woman to ministry. This will make all the difference in the world on how their relationship continues.

If your spouse is not behind your ministry it will never be what God intended it to be. When both spouses have an understanding and respect for the other one's calling, God's blessing and anointing will be unstoppable.

If we look in Acts 18, Romans 16, I Corinthians 16 and 2 Timothy 4 we read of Priscilla and Aquilla, team or co-pastors. They worked together on leading the church in their home. Most scholars will say that Priscilla was probably the prominment pastor. Now, that husband had to have really had a lot of confidence in his wife; as well as confidence in who he was in Christ, in order for him to not feel threatened by her gifts.

It is so important for each person to understand each other's calling and gifts. Be confident in who you are in Christ, knowing that He has given you both gifts to be used, to complete and strengthen the other person's calling. If we can get a grasp on this thought there would not be so much hurt and disappointment.

Some women are called to support and encourage their spouse, while others are called to support and encourage; in addition to, co-laboring as pastor's. Discuss these issues before you are married. Do you both agree on your role as wife, mother, and minister? Talk it out so you will know if there are differences, and come to an agreement before marriage. This will eliminate heated discussions and disagreements after marriage.

God can do awesome works when you are both in agreement on your giftings and callings. One thing that will hinder God's plans is the disagreement of how you both "fit" into ministry.

When God calls you both to ministry and you both work together understanding each other's role and gift you will be a mighty force for the Kingdom.

Next post will be on the subject of mentoring. Find out just who you will be mentoring by checking in tomorrow.


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