Since I entered ministry 25 years ago I have felt a lack in the mentoring/coaching aspect to pastor's wives. It is my opinion that as women, who are the wives of pastor's, we have too long kept silent when it comes to coaching the pastor's wives in our care, or new pastor's wives in our area.
I want to pose a question to all of you that are out there reading, "Is this right?"
I have heard many pastor's wives say that you learn from experience. This is true, but can we not have a heart for the young pastor's wives and mentor/coach them along the way - helping them learn valuable lessons before they lose heart and give up?
I truly believe we have a responsibility as leaders to help those following this path of ministry. Will we stand before God and be asked how we helped other women?
Let's be challenged by Elijah and become the Elijah's to the Elisha's in our lives - other women in ministry. Senior Pastor's wives, allow the Holy Spirit to move upon your heart to pass the mantle to women within your care. Do not be closed and afraid of being hurt. Do we not take risks in any relationship we begin developing. No matter what relationship we are in it is inevitable we will be hurt at some point. The important thing is how we handle and deal with the hurt.
I will take it one step further and challenge the Youth Pastor or Associate's wife to be open to learn and glean from what the Senior Pastor's wife has to offer. It is to your detriment that you think you know everything and cannot receive. You will miss out on many blessings God has to give. This is not to say that every Youth Pastor or Associate's wife has an attitude of knowing everything, but I have seen, too often, in my years of ministry, that attitude.
Take advantage of the opportunity to grow and mature under her leadership, if she is willing to open up to you. Learn and seek her council. Allow her the opportunity to share what she has learned from the battlefield.
What about gathering together monthly with the women in leadership in your church. Do fun activities which you all enjoy. You can have an agenda and lesson, but the main thing is to develop relationships so you can be a support to each other. Have another woman in ministry come and speak to your women. The sky is the limit. Use your imagination and see God move in your lives.
If you have suggestions and are doing something that is working write and let me know and we will post it as a resource to others.
We are in this adventure of ministry together, so let's do everything we can to encourage and support one another along the way.
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Sunday, September 30, 2007
The Ezer Kenegdo Woman
If you have not read the book "Captivating" by John and Stasi Eldredge you need to take the time and read it. One chapter of the book talks about Gen. 1:18; the "helpmeet passage." It is brought out that a better translation is lifesaver alongside. There is sooooo much more, you'll have to read about it.
Being the lifesaver alongside my man motivates me to come alongside my husband and encourage and help him in ministry. We are to complete, not compete. If you feel as if you are to minister as pastor alongside your husband, come into agreement and do the best you can, bringing glory to God. You are not ministering for your own selfworth and glory. You are ministering in that capacity because God desires you to be there.
Another thing we can do as women in ministry is come alongside other in ministry in ministry, as encouragers and supporters. We need each other. My prayer is that we get out of the mindset of keeping things to ourselves - that is dangerous - open up to each other and share your hurts, disappointments and by all means your accomplishments. This is how we help each other. By doing this we will hopefully encourage someone that was ready to give up on ministry, marriage, or life.
Come alongside each other and develop into the women God created each of us to be.
Being the lifesaver alongside my man motivates me to come alongside my husband and encourage and help him in ministry. We are to complete, not compete. If you feel as if you are to minister as pastor alongside your husband, come into agreement and do the best you can, bringing glory to God. You are not ministering for your own selfworth and glory. You are ministering in that capacity because God desires you to be there.
Another thing we can do as women in ministry is come alongside other in ministry in ministry, as encouragers and supporters. We need each other. My prayer is that we get out of the mindset of keeping things to ourselves - that is dangerous - open up to each other and share your hurts, disappointments and by all means your accomplishments. This is how we help each other. By doing this we will hopefully encourage someone that was ready to give up on ministry, marriage, or life.
Come alongside each other and develop into the women God created each of us to be.
Monday, September 17, 2007
Pastor's Wives Making the "Abishai Choice!"
We read in I Samuel 26:5-8 about David asking who will go with him into the enemy's camp, which was Saul's camp. Abishai stepped up to the plate and said "I will go." He did not have to make that choice, but he did. He was willing to do whatever it took to back his leader up. I would like to challenge the pastor's wife and associate pastor's wife to make an "Abishai choice." Do whatever it takes to be the support you need to be for your fellow pastor's wife. She may be different, have different opinions, may not even want to be involved in ministry as you, but we need to be there for each other.
There are too many pastor's wives suffering from loneliness and isolation. Let's encourage and support each other, because who else is going to give us the support we need. Hopefully as co-laborers together we can understand how the other is feeling, whether it is nervouseness, due to just starting the adventure as a pastor's wife, or a change is about to take place and you aren't ready for it.
Call someone in your area up, get to know them, make the "Abishai choice," become the Abishai she needs.
There are too many pastor's wives suffering from loneliness and isolation. Let's encourage and support each other, because who else is going to give us the support we need. Hopefully as co-laborers together we can understand how the other is feeling, whether it is nervouseness, due to just starting the adventure as a pastor's wife, or a change is about to take place and you aren't ready for it.
Call someone in your area up, get to know them, make the "Abishai choice," become the Abishai she needs.
Sunday, September 9, 2007
Have We Let Church Rob Us of Our Passion for Christ?
Here's a thought for each of us in ministry to consider.
"Why did we get into ministry?"
Most likely we felt a "tug" in our spirit; otherwise known as a "calling." At that point in our life we probably had a passion for seeing people get to know Christ and living life to their fullest potential.
But, what happened as we began working in our churches?
Life happened!!!
All the enthusiasm we once had is being sucked out of our lives the more we have to listen to church people criticise our husbands, our kids, and even our self. We can only take so much. I know I have been there. We are excited about ministry. We want to do what we can for the kingdom. We work, work, work. Only to hear, "We can't do ministry that we. We have never done it that way before." I am sure you all have heard that one and many more.
Well, I was challenged tonight about passion. John 15:4,5 talks about bearing fruit, fruit that will last. What fruit are we as pastor's wives bearing? Have we forgotten the call? Are we letting our enemy the devil win a battle. I am not about to let satan win the battle of my calling in my life. I hope you are not willing either. If we give up and let church rob us of our calling and passion then satan has won.
I refuse to let him! I just about did, because I was tired of dealing with people, but God is still beside me encouraging me to go further in Him and bear more fruit.
One way I am going to do that is by encouraging other pastor's wives to hang in there and defeat our enemy. I am here for you. Don't give up! One thing I heard tonight that was so good is this, "There is always more ground to take if you choose to take it." I choose to stay in this race and help others come to know Christ more; that includes pastor's wives and women in ministry who are burnt out and tired.
Restore that passion!
Pray this prayer with me: "Dear God, I am tired and worn out, and don't feel as if I have any more to give. I really don't have any desire to give any more. There has been too many hurts and struggles. I know You love me and are still there for me, I just lost my way a bit. Please forgive me and help me get back on track again. Please, dear Jesus, restore the joy of Your salvation to me. Help me revive my passion for You and sharing You with others. Keep me on track and always guide me back on course when I lose sight of where I should be going. Please send other women my way to help me stay on course and encourage me when I need it the most. Thank you God for caring for me. I love You and will serve You always. In Jesus precious name Amen.
Please write me and let me know what you think. I look forward to hearing what you have to say.
"Why did we get into ministry?"
Most likely we felt a "tug" in our spirit; otherwise known as a "calling." At that point in our life we probably had a passion for seeing people get to know Christ and living life to their fullest potential.
But, what happened as we began working in our churches?
Life happened!!!
All the enthusiasm we once had is being sucked out of our lives the more we have to listen to church people criticise our husbands, our kids, and even our self. We can only take so much. I know I have been there. We are excited about ministry. We want to do what we can for the kingdom. We work, work, work. Only to hear, "We can't do ministry that we. We have never done it that way before." I am sure you all have heard that one and many more.
Well, I was challenged tonight about passion. John 15:4,5 talks about bearing fruit, fruit that will last. What fruit are we as pastor's wives bearing? Have we forgotten the call? Are we letting our enemy the devil win a battle. I am not about to let satan win the battle of my calling in my life. I hope you are not willing either. If we give up and let church rob us of our calling and passion then satan has won.
I refuse to let him! I just about did, because I was tired of dealing with people, but God is still beside me encouraging me to go further in Him and bear more fruit.
One way I am going to do that is by encouraging other pastor's wives to hang in there and defeat our enemy. I am here for you. Don't give up! One thing I heard tonight that was so good is this, "There is always more ground to take if you choose to take it." I choose to stay in this race and help others come to know Christ more; that includes pastor's wives and women in ministry who are burnt out and tired.
Restore that passion!
Pray this prayer with me: "Dear God, I am tired and worn out, and don't feel as if I have any more to give. I really don't have any desire to give any more. There has been too many hurts and struggles. I know You love me and are still there for me, I just lost my way a bit. Please forgive me and help me get back on track again. Please, dear Jesus, restore the joy of Your salvation to me. Help me revive my passion for You and sharing You with others. Keep me on track and always guide me back on course when I lose sight of where I should be going. Please send other women my way to help me stay on course and encourage me when I need it the most. Thank you God for caring for me. I love You and will serve You always. In Jesus precious name Amen.
Please write me and let me know what you think. I look forward to hearing what you have to say.
Friday, September 7, 2007
Finding My PTO
Do you have PTO? Personal Time Out is a time set aside specifically for myself, to rejunvenate my spirit. I start each day with my morning 30 minute walk. I enjoy this time because I am able to pray and worship the Lord as I go. Whenever someone passes me I make sure I am not talking or singing so they do not think I am crazy talking to myself. Up until about 3 years ago I found it hard to find this quiet time for myself. It has helped to live near a beach and enjoy the relaxing setting. I have four children , 21, 19, 17, 16, so I need this time to pray for each one and then pray my husband and myself. I treasure this time and look forward to it, even when I don't neccessarily want to get out of bed at 6:45 am.
What are some of the ways you find your PTO? I look forward to hearing what you do.
What are some of the ways you find your PTO? I look forward to hearing what you do.
Sunday, September 2, 2007
Recommendations and Endorsements for Cheryl
March 7, 2007
To Whom It May Concern:
It is with great pleasure that I recommend Cheryl Turnbull to minister at your upcoming event. I have enjoyed getting to know her and her husband over the past twenty years.
Cheryl is an intelligent and motivated individual. She is definitely a leader rather than a follower. She has proven her leadership ability by organizing Women’s Ministries, helped lead and organize Women’s Encounters, in addition to being Office Manager at Glad Tidings Church.
She has been Women’s Ministries Representative as well as Missionettes Representative for the Potomac District of the Assemblies of God. She has had many opportunities to speak at women’s and girl’s functions. Her good judgment and sensitivity to the Lord as well as women’s needs and women in ministry are evident in the messages she brings.
Cheryl would be a valuable addition to any event you are planning, and I am happy to give her my wholehearted endorsement.
Sincerely,
Jerry Qualls
Senior Pastor - Glad Tidings Church
Executive Presbyter - Potomac District Council
Cheryl Turnbull is a woman who does an excellent job ministering a biblically based & sound truth right to where the ladies live. Her humor, ministry experience, tender testimony, broken spirit, passion for God and love for women of all ages create a warm atmosphere for God to move in hearts.
I would recommend her ministry as a great benefit to your women and girls.
Linda M. Webb
Women's Ministries Director
POTOMAC DISTRICT COUNCIL
PO Box 690
(14525 John Marshall Highway)
Gainesville, VA 20156
(703) 753-0300
NEW EMAIL ADDRESS: lwebb@potomacag.org
This is a letter to recommend Cheryl Turnbull for ministry. I have known Cheryl for approximately 15 years. She was Women’s Ministries Representative while I was Potomac Women’s Ministries Director. We have worked together in areas of ministry, especially Women's Ministries. She has many gifts and talents and is well trained in ministry. Her good attitude and spirit are very evident as she works with women and girls. If I can provide any further information please feel free to contact me. Donna R. Tatem757-430-8657
To Whom It May Concern:
It is with great pleasure that I recommend Cheryl Turnbull to minister at your upcoming event. I have enjoyed getting to know her and her husband over the past twenty years.
Cheryl is an intelligent and motivated individual. She is definitely a leader rather than a follower. She has proven her leadership ability by organizing Women’s Ministries, helped lead and organize Women’s Encounters, in addition to being Office Manager at Glad Tidings Church.
She has been Women’s Ministries Representative as well as Missionettes Representative for the Potomac District of the Assemblies of God. She has had many opportunities to speak at women’s and girl’s functions. Her good judgment and sensitivity to the Lord as well as women’s needs and women in ministry are evident in the messages she brings.
Cheryl would be a valuable addition to any event you are planning, and I am happy to give her my wholehearted endorsement.
Sincerely,
Jerry Qualls
Senior Pastor - Glad Tidings Church
Executive Presbyter - Potomac District Council
Cheryl Turnbull is a woman who does an excellent job ministering a biblically based & sound truth right to where the ladies live. Her humor, ministry experience, tender testimony, broken spirit, passion for God and love for women of all ages create a warm atmosphere for God to move in hearts.
I would recommend her ministry as a great benefit to your women and girls.
Linda M. Webb
Women's Ministries Director
POTOMAC DISTRICT COUNCIL
PO Box 690
(14525 John Marshall Highway)
Gainesville, VA 20156
(703) 753-0300
NEW EMAIL ADDRESS: lwebb@potomacag.org
This is a letter to recommend Cheryl Turnbull for ministry. I have known Cheryl for approximately 15 years. She was Women’s Ministries Representative while I was Potomac Women’s Ministries Director. We have worked together in areas of ministry, especially Women's Ministries. She has many gifts and talents and is well trained in ministry. Her good attitude and spirit are very evident as she works with women and girls. If I can provide any further information please feel free to contact me. Donna R. Tatem757-430-8657
We Need Each Other
Let me introduce myself. My name is Cheryl and I have been in ministry alongside my husband for 25 years. We have 4 wonderful children, one son in college, one son is handicapped, and two girls in highschool (Junior and Senior.)When I first entered ministry 25 years ago as a youth pastor's wife I needed a friend in ministry and did not have what I needed. There were women in ministry I knew, but it seemed the friendships were superficial. In fact one pastor's wife told me recently you have to be friendly in order to have friends and she was not willing to open up to other pastor's wives. That seems like a lonely road to travel. I travelled that lonely road for many years. It affected me to the point in which it almost cost me my family.
There has been a prick in my spirit all these years for a support/resource for women in ministry. God has kept that alive over the years and now is the time I feel He is opening the door and telling me to walk through.
If you are a woman in ministry and need someone to confide in, or whatever your need, email me. You can also check out my website at http://www.mentoringwomeninministry.com/ and sign up for our monthly newsletter and read our first issue.
I look forward to hearing from women, just as encouragement for others.
What do you think? Is this important or not? Do women who are in the trenches of ministry need this? Are we willing to unveil our concerns, hurts, disappointments, and joy to other women, in order to help mentor each other? Let me know.
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