Patience in the Midst of Excitement

When there is a sense God is about to do something extraordinary it is hard to be patient.

That is where I am right now. I was taking my bike ride a couple of days ago and had this awesome sense of anticipation. Something is on the verge of exploding and I am not quite sure what it is. All I know is that I am going to be ready for when God decides the time is right to burst it forth.

In the midst of this anticipation I have also had thoughts of discouragement and hurt popping into my mind. I have to remember to immediately rebuke these thoughts, because they are only what Satan has put there to distract me from what God is doing. I ask God to renew my mind and give me healthy thoughts that will encourage and lift me into His presence.

If we are not aware of this we can easily give into our negative thoughts and before we know it we are overcome with self-doubt, self-pity, and self-distruction. Come against those thoughts. God wants us to grow past this place in our life and go where He is taking us.

Are your kids disappointing you? Do you feel as if you have been overlooked? Do you feel unappreciated? Remember, God is God and He desires to be "I Am" in your life. He wants to be what you need Him to be at this point in your life. He will be the shoulder you can cry on for your children. He will be your number one supporter when no one else is looking, or around.

Don't let Satan win over your thoughts. Take them captive. Think on what is good, lovely, pure, right, admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy. When we do this we are declaring we believe God and are ready to stand up against the enemy of our soul that is trying to destroy us.

So, I am excited about what God is doing. I can become impatient, especially when those discouraging thoughts begin; BUT I REFUSE TO GIVE INTO THOSE THOUGHTS and will continue to patiently wait with excitement, for what God is doing in my life, and those around me.

Just Excited About Being a Part of the Kingdom of God!

Today I was just excited about being in God's family...

I was excited about who God is in my life...

I was excited about what God is doing in my life...

It can be very easy to take our life in Christ for granted...especially if we are so busy in ministry and have a family to care for daily.

I have been reading Acts and studying how the church started and it's development; paying close attention to how Paul started the churches on his journey's and how he continued to lead oversee them. It has been a very interesting and thoughtful journey on my part.

I have been reading Paul's letters to those churches he established. I finished 1 & 2 Corinthians, Romans and am now in the middle of Ephesians. At the end of chapter 3 Paul encourages the church to live life "fully alive" in Christ.

Paul was an amazing man. God had completely changed his life. He went from persecuting, to persecuted. He once had a passion to destroy and kill the church. God helped him redirect that passion and energy to growing the church. Here he was in prison, much like the ones 'she once was determined to put Christians in, encouraging the Ephesians to be strong and fully alive in Christ. Our purpose is to be strong, fully alive in Christ, and motivating other’s in their faith.

That is what has made me excited. I want to follow Paul's example. No matter where I am, what I'm doing, I want my passion for Christ to permeate my every being.

The reality is when we are trying to develop teenagers in our home we have to work harder than we ever imagined to stay focused on the excitement of God's calling on our lives. Teenagers drain a lot of energy from our lives. We have to make sure we stay in the Word and have daily talks with God to keep sane and energized.

Well that is what has gone through my mind today. "God help me have the same excitement as Paul and stay fully alive in Christ. Amen."

Thank You God!

There are times when you just have to stop and say, "Thank You God."

It has been a while since I posted due to family visiting from out of state, but now that they are gone I hope to get back on track.

As moms we all want to be able to have our children come talk to us about any issue going on in their lives. When we try to talk to them and ask them how things are going they don't always have a desire to talk. The moments they do want to talk are few and far between.

Today was one of those days. After running some errands with one of my girls we came home and went for a bike ride. Now most of the time when I ask the girls this they don't want to go with me. Today she took me up on my offer. We took our bikes and headed to the Board Walk. We had a lot of fun and conversation just happened.

I was very impressed with the amount of spiritual maturity this daughter was exemplifying. We were discussing certain issues they are having to deal with in their circle of friends and as she continued to talk I was becoming concerned about some of the things she was saying. As she got into the conversation more and told me how she spoke up for what she felt was right I realized she was very mature in what she did.

Here I was ready to do something about the situation. I had already been praying about the situation, but when I heard these things I was ready to "do" something. After hearing what she had to say I knew she was very capable of hearing from God and doing what He would expect of her.

As moms it is our desire to protect our children. We do not want to see them get hurt or overlooked, especially when you feel they have been treated wrongly. We have to remember they are God's children also and we have to let them grow up. Sure we raise them and teach them how to live according to the Word, but it is, many times, hard for the parents to let go of them in order for them to mature. We may have the tendency to think they are not mature enough to make decisions, but if they do not get out there and learn by mistakes they make, they will not be able to mature.

Part of maturing is allowing our children the freedom to learn from mistakes. It is definitely hard to see them make a wrong decision, but we need to ask God for wisdom and guidance to help us "let go and let God."

I had tried several times, in the past, to talk to this daughter about this particular situation, but she never wanted to talk. In fact most of the time she thinks I am in the way and being nosy, when I am honestly concerned about what is going on. By spending time riding our bikes together, just having fun, and talking, a God moment happened. We were able to talk about all aspects of the situation and I was able to bring out the good and bad points of both sides of the situation. If I would have sat her down and tried to lecture her on the issue she would not have listened.

This is all part of "intentional mentoring" I wrote about in a previous post. Look for these opportunities and be ready for them. If I would have been too busy and not wanted to spend the time with my daughter, or did not even ask her because she says no so often I would not have had this time with her.

This was an opportunity to spend time with someone I love and want to help influence in the right direction. One day she will understand and be thankful also.

So...I want to say, "Thank you God!"

God I Am Still Gonna Trust You

A little history...when our second son was 15 months old, 18 years ago, he came down with spinal meningitis (our oldest son was 4.) Daniel was not expected to live through the night. While he was in the hospital for 6 weeks I spent a lot of time in the hospital chapel.

During this time in the chapel God brought the word restoration to my mind. I did a word study on the word and wrote the definition, along with ways I was asking God to restore Daniel, in my journal. I still have that paper...it's a little worn and yellowed, but I have it as a reminder. I truly believed Daniel was going to come out of the hospital able to walk and talk and just be his normal self. There is so much to say, but bottom line, he came out of hospital, but according to neurologist in a semi-comatose state. Daniel was totally dependent upon us for his survival.

His brother, Jonathan, was a trooper. As we led our congregations we taught and preached healing and deliverance. We knew God could heal and still believe that He does. We taught our son, Jon, and his sisters to believe for Daniel's healing, as well as others. One Sunday evening when Jon was about 10 and Daniel 8 Jon went to the church nursery and brought Daniel in his wheelchair to the altar for prayer. They laid hands on Daniel and prayed for healing. Every move Daniel made Jon would open his eyes with anticipation for Daniel to get up out of the wheelchair. I saw the disappointment when it didn't happen.

My prayer over the years has been that my children continue to believe and not allow a disappointment, such as this, to hinder their faith. Jon is now 22 and having a hard time totally trusting God and allowing him to direct his life. He is trying to do things on his own.

This is hard for a mom and dad to watch, but their is nothing we can do except pray. And believe me, that is what I am doing. God has done many things for Daniel. He is happy when most people with trauma to the brain like he had, have to take medication to calm them. Not Daniel. He is happy and joyful, which was one of the things on my list of restoration. His brain is not restored, but I can still believe. If God can raise Lazarus from the dead and recreate those dead brain cells, he can do that for our son, Daniel.

In the mean time I continue to pray for my son, Jon, to overcome his hurt and disappointment and see what God has done in Daniel's life. All he can see now is a brother that was taken from him. Someone he once played with was taken and he grew up without that friend he once had. He sees Daniel lying in his bed or sitting in his wheelchair unable to do anything. If he was not taken care of he would die.

I have thought about that often. I ask God to help me continue to thank Him for the testimony Daniel has had to everyone in whom he has touched.

My main point in all this is...when you are a ministry family that believes in the miraculous and it does not happen when you expect it, or the way you expect it, do not give up on your faith. When a member of your family is hindered in their faith because of what happened in their life, keep praying. Do not ever give up! At some point they will come around. We have to keep Hebrews 11 in the forefront of our mind.

God is soveriegn and He knows what is best for all involved. When you feel like giving up read Hebrews 11. There will be those times you will want to feel sorry for yourself and have a pitty party. It is ok to feel that way. We are human. JUST DON'T STAY THERE! Find someone that will help you rise above your feelings.

Remember, God loves you and will always be by your side.

God's Got My Back!

This is for all you women who have a dream and vision in your spirit. If you have held it inside and are afraid to voice it because you're not sure anyone will listen, read what God tells Jeremiah in Jer. 1:17 - 19 of The Message, "'...up on your feet and get dressed for work! Stand up and say your piece. Say exactly what I tell you to say. Don't pull your punches or I'll pull you out of the lineup....you're a one-man defense system against this culture...they'll fight you, but they won't even scratch you. I'll back you up every inch of the way.' God's Decree."

At one time I was working on something I felt God wanted me to do. It had been in my spirit for a long time and I had been praying about the timing. One day while sitting on the beach I read the scripture above and was overwhelmed with God's presence. Little did I know that when I met with leadership 2 days later I would feel exactly like what Jeremiah was talking about when he said, "You're a one-man defense system, against Judah's kings and princes, against the priests and local leaders."

I was encouraged because God told Jeremiah that they were going to fight him, but not scratch him. God said He would back Jeremiah up every step of the way. At that point in time I felt exactly like that. I felt like I was one woman against these men who had their own opinions of what should and shouldn't be done.

When you are in the midst of trying to make your dream a reality it seems as if it will never happen. We have to remind ourselves that God has our back. He planted the vision in our hearts and He will bring it about in His timing. The obstacles we face on the way are only opportunities for us to develop our spirit.

Don't give up on your dreams. What has God placed in your heart to do? Are you still holding on to dreams you have had for years? Pray over it. Listen to God and speak up and let God move. God's got your back and He will bring them about in the best time.

We Are Not A Number!

There are 2 scriptures that have been very encouraging to me over the past several months. When it seems as if you are getting nowhere, you're going in circles with trying to get something accomplished that you know God has called you to and you're ready to give up, remember the word's of Paul.

He quotes Hosea in Romans 9 of The Message, "...I'll call nobodies and make them somebodies; I'll call the unloved and make them beloved. In the place where they yelled out, 'You're nobody!' they're calling you 'God's living children.'"
He goes on to quote Isaiah in Romans 9 of The Message, "...God doesn't count us; he calls us by name."

I love those two verses. We live in such a numeric age where everyone is a number...you call your credit card company, they want your number...you call the power company, they want your number...it goes on and on and on.

Paul reminds us that God is personal, "Arithmetic is not his focus."

We are not a number to Him. He is our God, our father, our friend, our companion, our support, our deliver, our encourager, etc. He will be whatever we need Him to be at any given time in our life. And I thank Him for that constantly.

I need Him to the giver of wisdom daily with my 17 and 18 year old daughters. Even my 22 year old son seeks me out for wisdom. Thank goodness God doesn't get tired of me asking Him. I have found that as children get older, we parents, need more wisdom from God.

When our children are smaller we tell them what to do and they obey or else, right? lol When they are older we parents have to let them go, so they can make their own decisions. That is where we need wisdom. God gave our children to us to raise "in the ways of the Lord." We then have to give them to God as they are grown so they can make their own decisions. If the decisions are not the ones we would make, we have to remember our children are God's. We did what we were suppose to, now we have to make sure we do not renege and try to control their lives.

THAT IS VERY HARD TO DO! BUT WE HAVE TO ALLOW THEM TO MAKE MISTAKES AND LEARN FROM THEM, JUST AS WE DID.

If we are wise God will teach us through the circumstances some spiritual lessons. It may be hard. It may be difficult. But, WE CAN DO IT.

I am sure if any of you reading have been through this already and have some wonderful words of encouragement the women would welcome the comments.

Remembering to Relax

I am ending a wonderful day of enjoying the beach. I was reminded that too often the life of a minister is much too hectic. Many times the minister and his wife are so busy helping their congregation they don't take time to relax and enjoy life.

Please make sure you take time to enjoy the ministry God has given and the family He has given. Spend time having fun with your family as well as time alone. This will rejuvenate and motivate you.

Think of all the good God has done and thank Him for his goodness.

I am thankful I have this time and pray I will never forget to take time to enjoy life. I allowed myself to become too busy with ministry for a long time. I am determined to not allow that to happen again.

The Kiteboarding Christian/Leader (part 2)

The third type of kite surfing Christian is the Daring Christian/Daring Leader. This person is not satisfied with the norm. They are unable to sit on the shore and watch while other people enjoy the surfing. They are in the middle of all the action. The ocean is where they will be found surfing....no lakes for them. They have learned from experience how to handle the waves.

Each wave is a new challenge. The stronger the wind, the better. They allow the kite to help them soar high above the wave. They head into the wave, jump it, lift the board high and go with the wind. It's crazy, some of the stunts kite surfers do. They twist, flip, go one handed, whatever they can imagine doing they do. They are only limited by their abilites and imagination.

As Christians and Leaders we need to set a goal to become a Daring Kite Surfer. The kite surfer's foundation is the board. The foundation we surf on is Christ. We need to be rooted and grounded firmly in Him with a strong belief and faith. The daring kite surfer uses only the best board available. The best board for the Christian is Christ. Let's put our feet on, grab hold of the kite handle allowing the kite of the Holy Spirit to be picked up by the wind of God and His presence. We will then be soaring into the new adventure God has for us.

We can go along on an even keel and enjoy the smooth surfing; but, before too long though, it will become mundane and boring, with no excitement. As a daring kite surfer we will understand the challenges we face, as Christians, will only be waves giving us the opportunity to grow in Christ. We will be able to learn new techniques on the board and develop our spiritual discipline. We will be on our way to new heights and new levels in Christ.

As a daring Christian we will realize the obstacles are not there to deter us, but opportunities to become stronger and more daring. We will become someone the devil will not be able to overtake.

When the wind is stronger and the waves are larger the kite surfer can go higher and farther. They will be carried on the wind, which spiritually speaking is God's presence. The hurts, disappointments, and trials that come into our lives will not deter the daring Christian. They will head straight into them knowing they will be able to do some crazy stunts; such as believe for people to be healed, believe for people to accept Christ, or stand up for morals and go against the norm of society, to name a few.

They will become stronger and wiser as they are going through these trials. James 1:2-4 tells us to "count it all joy" when this happens because we grow stronger.

As daring Christians we need to allow the Holy Spirit to take us higher and farther in our spiritual journey. Use the wave, which is our trial, to rise higher than we ever thought possible. Do not allow it to take us under and wipe out. If this happens we will be able to get back up, but not without injury.

Become a daring believer with me. Let's show this generation and generations to come what a true Christian is all about. Life in Christ is an adventure. Don't be satisfied with the smooth surfing of everyday life. Take the challenge and welcome the raging sea. Ride high on the waves that come. They won't be every day. The ocean, and God, is like that...smooth surfing one day and daring the next. This allows for rest and recovery.

No kite surfer can surf 24/7. Physically they would be exhausted. We all have to spend quiet time developing our inner being. We have to learn to be who God wants us to be. This helps us recover from the energy spent on rough surfing and sharing our faith...doing crazy stunts for Christ. (Phil. 4:13)

Will you join me for the ride of our life? Let's ride the waves together and be the Daring Christian/Daring Leader God means for us to be.

The Kiteboarding Christian/Leader (part 1)

I was sitting on my 3rd floor balcony one evening about 8 pm and noticed a kite surfer in the water. The water was not calm, but this guy was having a great time. He was doing some awesome jumps; soaring with the wind.

This was another one of those times the Holy Spirit dropped a thought into my heart. He is helping me to develop it...

As Christian's and spiritual leaders we can learn from the kite surfer. We can be one of three types of Christians:

Safe Christian/Safe Leader:
This person is like the kite surfer that goes out on a day when the water is smooth and the wind is not too strong. They prefer the safety of the lakes. They know their surfboard (their foundation) will keep them afloat. The kite wil take them around the lake and they can see the shore line. They see their boundaries. The lake is one big circle, so they can only go so far with in the limits of the lake. More often than not the water is calm with no waves, unless a boat passes by and stirs up the water. No rough surfing for this type of kite surfer.

They are comfortable. There are no risks. Spiritually speaking kite surfer Christians are careful not to upset the "norm" of church life. "If we haven't needed to do something different in the past why start now?" They would prefer not to change things up. If someone challenges the way things are done they are seen as rebellious and non-conforming, not wanting to submit, and the "Safe Christian/Safe Leader" does not want to be seen in that light.

Bold Christian/Bold Leader:
Now this person is a little more open in the way they do life in general. They like it when a boat comes along in the lake and brings a few waves for them to jump. They will even venture out into the ocean. They see the waves as a challenge and a way to improve their kite surfing ability. They accept and welcome the challenge. They do not run from it, they surf into it straight on, nose into the wave. They even have the courage to jump a few waves. They are becoming bolder with each jump.

Each jump makes them stronger. They develop stronger muscles in the arms and start learning more techniques that others start to admire. The way they are developing and growing inspires others to follow along after them. Others say, "Hey I want to do that...I can do that!"

Spiritually speaking this type of kite surfer, the "Bold Christian/Bold Leader," begins to enjoy their Christian life and leadership more and more. When they see how their ability to surf inspires others they become restless and more daring in their surfing. They want to do better because others are watching them and want to be like them. Without realizing it they have become a daring Christian.

Be sure to watch for the next post and conclusion to the "Kite Surfing Christian/Leader."

Relieving Stress

OK. Let's just be straight with each other. As women we can have an abundance of stress in our lives when it deals with our family - added to that is the stress of the church when you are in ministry.

We have to deal with balancing the support we need to give our husband and children. When they do not see eye to eye on issues moms can feel like they are stuck in the middle. That is not a great place to be. Who likes to be sandwiched in between 2 strong willed situations? I don't think anyone. It is a difficult place to be. Some women may have to deal with the "either, or," not the easy "ok I'll support my husband." It may be she is in the situation that if she does support her husband she will lose her kids. If she supports her kids she puts a "wedge" between she and her husband.

What's a woman to do? It seems as if she is "stuck between a rock and a hard place," to use the old phrase.

I was contemplating this thought this morning, since many women have to go through this issue. It is amazing how God drops things into your spirit. I learned, from Kathy Troccolli, to call this "kisses from the King." When Jesus was on the cross he took the weight of the world on his shoulders. I thought of the stress and pressure in each one of our lives. We live with this every day. If we think it is heavy on our shoulders, multilply that a million times over and you will get some understanding of what Jesus had to carry.

We don't have it so bad after all. I know it is still hard and difficult to deal with, but try to remember this fact and lay it at Jesus' feet - release it to Him. Allow Him to help you with your burdens and cares. Doesn't Peter tell us to cast all our cares on Him because He cares for us? Then let's do what he tells us. I know it is easier to say than to do; but "Just Do It." You will be glad you did.

If you have some issues you are dealing with and God has given you some insight write me a post. I want to hear.

Still Learning from Saul

Well, I wanted to bring out the good aspects of Saul because we do not hear of it often. Now I have been thinking of the not so good aspects of Saul's leadership.

I hope you get as much out of this study as I have.

Saul began his leadership on the right foot, humble; but as he became familiar with the role and saw the success he began to become overconfident. He became proud and assumed Samuel's role at one point. That was a terrible mistake. We learn from Saul that pride and self-confidence without the Holy Spirit will lead to anger, resentment, and disappointment. Read about some of this in I Samuel 15.

In one instance when he was suppose to destroy everyone and everything Saul captured the king and did not kill him. Samuel reminds Saul that he had nothing when he started out, then God made him head of Israel – made him king! What a privilege! “God sent you off with orders. Why did you not obey Him? Why, with God’s eyes on you all the time, did you brazenly carry out this evil?”(I Sam. 15:17-19) Saul starts making excuses and asks what is wrong with taking a few choice sheep? He was avoiding the issue.

I think of one of my daughters when she was 17. She deliberately disobeyed and wrote me a long letter apologizing and explaining why she did what she did. She was making excuses. She missed the point of her deliberate disobedience.

Samuel told Saul straight up that he did not want sacrifices and empty rituals. He wanted him to listen and do what he told him. Because Saul refused to listen and said no to God, God said no to Saul’s kingship.

In our own ministries we need to be careful not to become prideful in our accomplishments and knowledge, thinking we know more than anyone else. Too often I have seen young youth pastors or associates and their wives come into church all excited about ministry, but exemplify an attitude of, “I know more than you.”

This is not healthy for them or the church in which they are ministering. They will not be able to glean from the knowledge of those who have gone before them. I have seen wonderful ministries, such as Master’s Commission or other similar programs, teach servant leadership. They teach students to develop a servant heart. The ministry teaches the student that all areas of the church give you an opportunity in which to minister, whether it be cleaning the bathrooms or speaking in front of fifty or a thousand people. You learn that the attitude of the heart is important, not what special abilities you have.

My prayer is that I keep a simple, humble attitude of the heart, so God has a good fertile ground to work in daily. This is hard because when you do wonderful things ,and see success you naturally have a tendency to become proud of your accomplishments. It is ok to be proud of what you do and confident in the Lord, but when we start doing things on our own and our own way we are setting ourselves up for trouble. It may not happen soon, but it will happen.

To bring it home to us think about Arwen in "The Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring." The scene is right after Frodo gets stabbed by the wraith sword. He is dying and needs help. Arwen comes and tells Strider she is the faster rider and she needs to get Frodo to her father in Rivendale. She puts Frodo on her horse and rides away with the nine wraiths close behind. She gets to the river and with confidence she looks straight at the wraith and says, "If you want him come and get him." She then begins speaking in Elvish and the waters rise up and overtake the wraiths.

Right after that Frodo seems to be slipping away. Arwen bends over him and says, "What grace is given me let it pass to him. Let him be spared." She had confidence in who she was, what ability she had through her people (father), and was willing to step out and take the risk.

As women in ministry know who you are in Christ. Know what He has called you to do. Have confidence to be who God wants you to be. Have confidence in the ability He has given you. Be willing to take a risk for what you believe in your heart to be true.

You are special and God has a desire to use you for His glory.

Let me know how He is accomplishing His plan in your life.

The Wisdom of Saul

Not only did God choose the best when He chose Saul as king, he also gave him wisdom.

As I stated before, Saul did not pay attention to the negative talk of those who did not want to follow his leadership. He went about his business. While going on about his own business he heard about an enemy threatening his people.

The Message tells us in I Samuel 11:6 that, "The Spirit of God came on Saul when he heard the report and he flew into a rage." He was angry that someone was trying to scare his people and destroy them. He had the confidence of God. He butchered the oxen and sent messengers throughout Israel warning the people that if they did not join with him their oxen would end up like his.

The Bible says the "terror of God" seized the people and they joined him. Saul took command and sent word that, "Help is on the way." God was with Saul and his men and they were victorious. After seeing the victory God had given them through Saul's leadership the people told Samuel to hand the men, who were against Saul, over them and they would kill them. Saul did not want this to happen. He wanted to celebrate the day and consecrate the kingship.

When God calls us He will give us the power, the courage, and the confidence to go into battle and conquer whatever is attacking us. As women in ministry we need to keep this in the forefront of our mind and spirit. The devil, our enemy, will try his best to keep us from what God has called us to; whether using circumstances in our family's life, our own life, or the life of our church.

I believe we need to stand as confident as Saul and get angry at the devil. Let him know who is in control here - definitely not him. As we take a stand the people around us will be strengthened and encouraged by our example. They will be proud to stand at our side and help us fight the battle. We can then celebrate the victory God has given. Victory may not happen over night, but hang in there, God will come through.

If you feel as if you are ready to "throw in the towel," don't do it! God is right there to be your support and strength.

If you are ready to give up on your marriage, don't do it! God will get you through. Ask Him to give you a new love for your spouse and refresh your marriage.

If you want to end ministry because it is too hurtful, don't do it! God will carry you. If your children are causing you discouragement, don't give up! God will give your family stability and get your children through the difficult circumstances.

Remember, you are special. God has called you and He will not let you down. He will not give up on you - so do not give up on Him.

God Chooses the Best!

I have recently been studying I Samuel. The story of God choosing Saul as king caught my attention. We often hear sermons on David, his great leadership and being a "man after God's own heart," and are reminded of the bad leadership of Saul.

As I was reading I Samuel 9 - 15 Saul stood out to me and I felt the lessons I am learning would be an encouragement to those just starting in ministry as well as those who have been at ministry a while.

The passages I will be quoting are from The Message Bible.

In chapters 9 and 10 Samuel obeys God and anoints Saul as king. In chapter 10:24 Samuel addresses the people and says, "Take a good look at whom God has chosen: the best! No one like him in the whole country!" At this time there were people who accepted Saul as king and followed him, but there were those who just could not grasp the idea that the Saul they knew was to lead them. They went off complaining, saying "don't make me laugh," refusing to congratulate him.

Many times when God calls us there will be those who just can't believe it! They know us too well and just can't comprehend that God would want to use us. They go off talking behind our backs with the idea they are not going to listen to anything we have to say. Remember though, God chooses the best. People around us do not see the potential God sees in us. All we need to do is remember it is God who does the calling, not our friends and family.

Look at what Saul did: "He paid them no mind." (10:27) When you know in your heart God has called you, that is all that matters. He is the one who has anointed you, not the complainers, and those who want to try to tear the calling from you.

There may be those who do not understand why the pastor's wife feels she is called to minister alongside her husband, in the forefront, and not in the background. There will be those who think the pastor's wife should have a particular ministry, just not the one you know God has called you to. Especially in a traditional church setting there will be those who just don't understand.

I want to admonish you to keep your head up and pay them no mind. God has called you! GOD IS ON YOUR SIDE! So, hang in there woman of God. You are special and designed for great things.

There is more I am learning from Saul, so stay tuned. I hope you will be encouraged also. By the way check out my website: http://www.mentoringwomeninministry.com/ and sign up for the monthly e-newseletter. You can view back issues by clicking on e-newsletters on the left of the screen.

Happy Mother's Day!

Mother's Day is special to all. During this time we think about our mom and what she has meant to us through the years. I know I am thankful that mom (as well as my dad) encouraged me to pursue the ministry God put in my heart.

There will always be "ups and downs" in ministry life, that is normal. There will always be disappointment and hurt, that's a given. There will be the stress of trying to do what God desires of you as well as trying to meet the needs of the people within your care.

The one constant that is to be our stablizing force and strength is God. His grace and mercy will always be right at our fingertips, whether we feel them or not.

When you are called into ministry and God has placed that desire to serve in your heart, you will not be happy doing anything else. I have tried to do other things when it seemed ministry was too tough, and there was an empty hole inside.

I thank God for a mom that sensed in her heart God's calling upon my life and encouraged me. She still encourages me when I get discouraged and upset.

My prayer is that I will be that kind of a mom to my children. I trust we will all keep in the forefront of our mind that our children are not to be sacrificed for the "call." They are more important than anyone in our congregation. If we don't take care of our own children then we have our priorities all wrong.

A wise woman in ministry one time said that she and her pastor husband thought it was important for them to attend their children's events, even if it conflicted with a Wednesday night or another night of the week. That was so freeing! I remember going to my son's baseball games and cross country events and not feeling guilty. As youth pastor I even became creative and planned for our youth to attend some of the sports events with me. We would have a study, relating to the sport we were going to attend, and then take vans to the event. It went over very well and the teens grasped the teaching so much better because the scripture was related to a sport.

Ask God to help you be creative in ways to encourage your children and guide them, in being sensitive to what God's plan is for their life. That should be our main goal in life, next to pleasing our husband of course.

If any of you wonderful moms read this before Mother's Day have a wonderful day and be blessed by the Lord and your family!

Getting Through the Disappointments and Hurts of Ministry

I believe we need to be careful and not let hurts and disappointments harbor in our hearts. It is a normal part of life to be hurt and disappointed, but God does not want us to let them stay. We need to forgive those who hurt and disappoint us and move forward. We need to deal with the hurt and disappointment. It is important to admit we have been hurt or disappointed.

I have mentioned hurt and disappoint a lot in the first paragraph. It is because I believe, as women in ministry, we do not allow ourselves to admit when we have been hurt or disappointed. We could be disappointed in the way our marriage has turned out, our ministry has developed (or not developed), or life in general. We need to admit and commit it to the Lord.

This is where the friendships with other women in ministry will be helpful. A good friend will see the hurt and disappointment and help you through it. This woman will be a friend in whom you can be accountable. Share hurts and fears with her. Ask her to pray and make you responsible for your thoughts and feelings. Do not be fake. Be real and open. That is the only way to overcome the anger and hurt.

Dr. Thurman, in The Lies We Believe quotes James Allen from his book As a Man Thinketh; "Every thought seed sown or allowed to fall into the mind and to take root there produces its own kind. good thoughts bear good fruit, bad thoughts bad." (pg24)

Dr. Thurman points out that lies are beliefs, expectations, and attitudes that are not reality. We get these expectations and attitudes from a variety of places: i.e. media like TV, radio, magazines, movies, etc. Our culture tells us we are to look, act, and talk a certain way. Even in ministry there are certain ways we are suppose to act and dress or people will look at us strangely. I am not talking about what the Bible says regarding how to dress and act. I am talking about the culture of ministry.

When we attend church functions or denominational meetings some of things we are thinking about before we go are ..... What do I wear? What will so and so be wearing?

We are to look presentable. It is ok to want to look good, but do not get carried away. We do not want to make others feel less than perfect if they don’t have what we have, or we should not feel bad if we can’t afford what someone else has.

Before I sign off I want to encourage you to think about the good that has happened in your ministry. What are some of the blessings God has given you? Think on these things. Allow the Holy Spirit to jog your memory. If you are going through a difficult time it will be a little harder to think of the good, but it is important that you do. It will help get you back on the right track.

God is so good. He wants you to succeed and prosper in ministry. He wants you to find a good woman to talk to and confide in. He knows how important it is to your spiritual and emotional health. If you already have this person write me and tell me about your relationship, so others will be encouraged. If you do not have this person yet, but are going to find someone please let me know when you do and let it be an encouragement to other women who may be hesitant on finding someone.

The Power of Godly Friendships continued

In my opinion it is very important to make a very determined effort to not let the meeting become superficial in which you are not open and cannot share. Let the goal be to help make each of you stronger, closer, and more trusting of each other. If it is just one or two people that is ok. The main thing is to make sure you get together.

Getting together is not meant to be a time of bashing churches or spouses or blaming other people for hurts and disappointments. If one of you is hurt it is to be a time of healing. If one of you feels like you are spiritually dying let it be a time of restoration. If you are just starting out in ministry or feel you are just fine, then it is to be a preventative maintenance regimen.

We have come from a culture that has told us to keep everything to ourselves. In my opinion I think that has been a mistake. Think of a marriage relationship for a moment - it cannot be healthy when the two people involved keep things inside. It is the same with people in ministry. If we are going through situations that seem too hard to go through DO NOT hold it all inside. It could very well lead to a crisis situation. Find someone to confide in and be a support for each other.

If anyone is more comfortable confiding in someone like myself please do not hesitate to email me at hstrymknwmn@hotmail.com.

The Power of Godly Friendships

We all need friends - especially women who are in ministry. When we give of ourselves continually we can become drained and just need someone to talk with that understands our lives. Other women can be friends, but they will not understand the life of a woman in ministry. That is why it is so important for women in ministry to open up to each other - and I have found that to be one of the most difficult things for a woman in ministry to do.

Why? There could be several reasons. Over the years women in ministry have learned to be "closed" so they would not be hurt, or hurt their husband's ministry. Little by little that is changing and women are coming to realize the need to be open. There have been too many pastor's families in crisis situations to ignore the need for relationships and better mentoring.

It is my opinion we need to develop friendships with other women in ministry. Take time to get to know each other. Break down denominational walls and get to know other women in ministry. We may not have the personality to go out and get to know someone we don't know, but it is very important we do. Be persistant. Schedule a meeting where you go to a coffee shop for the first time. Then meet monthly at the same place. Get other women together and go to the beach, or for a walk somewhere. The point is to just hang out and enjoy each other's company. A relationship will develop from there and when someone has a need for support or encouragement a relationship will have already been established to help.

I would love to hear how some of you are doing this already. Let me know your thoughts.

In one of my previous posts I talked about intential mentoring. My prayer is that some of these posts will be a part of a mentoring process in your life. This should not take the place of a physical woman in your life, but I trust I will be an encouragement.

Dr. Chris Thurman in his book, “The Lies We Believe,” says, “Most of our unhappiness and emotional struggles are caused by the lies we tell ourselves.” He goes on to say that until we recognize these lies and replace them with truth emotional health is impossible. (pg 22)

I didn’t realize it at the time, but I let hurts from our first pastorate, issues in two of our churches, and the disappointment of our handicapped son fester in my heart throughout years of ministry.

I grew up in Tulsa, OK, around positive preachers all my life, but I allowed all that positive influence to be crowded out by all the negative surrounding me. That was where I went wrong.

That is what I want each woman reading this to understand - DO NOT ALLOW THE ENEMY TO CROWD OUT THE POSITIVE THAT ONLY GOD CAN BRING INTO YOUR SPIRIT.

All around us we are told by the media, women, law, and some churches that we don’t have to put up with this; we can get out of the situation if we choose. I had let all these hurts and disappointments culminate to the point of despair in my life. I didn’t hear the voice of truth, because by the time I reached the point of despair, I had made up my mind and didn’t want to hear the truth. I was not looking to the Source; I was looking at things in my life God had not answered.

The reality was I was looking at lies and listening to Satan’s words, not God’s. I had to admit and confess all my wrong thinking. I had to ask God to forgive me and get me back on track. I would not wish that point of desperation on anyone.

You might be wondering how I could let myself get to that point. In all honesty I needed to be truthful with myself. I needed someone else to help me see that the road I was taking was only leading to destruction. I needed another woman in ministry, but I did not have that kind of a friendship.

As women in ministry this is of utmost importance - WE NEED FRIENDS! We need to have friends with other women in ministry. Why? Because they understand our circumstances. I will go into more detail in the next post.

Is Being "Called" Worth It? Is it a Privilege?

This is the beginning of a series on finding out whether we believe ministry is worth it or a privilege? I trust you will be encouraged by what is written and let me know what you think.

There are many ups and downs to this life of ministry. It is totally up to us how we deal with and handle them. We can let our spiritual life suffer, by letting hurt turn into anger. Anger, if not dealt with will eventually turn into bitterness. Or, we can allow the Holy Spirit to mature us to new, higher levels in Him. “In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.” Eph. 4:26, 27 NIV

Responding Successfully to the Ministry Challenge

What do we do when we are hurt? Do we lash out? Do we hold it inside? How we react to the hurts and disappointments in ministry and our life will affect us positively or negatively. We have two choices: one choice is to let God mature our spirit, the other choice is to let our enemy, the devil, destroy our spirit and eventually our life.

Next time I will quote from the book, "Lies We Believe," by Dr. Chris Thurman. Check back soon and let me know how you are feeling about the ministry you are in at this time.

Intentional Mentoring

Since I entered ministry 25 years ago I have felt a lack in the mentoring/coaching aspect to pastor's wives. It is my opinion that as women, who are the wives of pastor's, we have too long kept silent when it comes to coaching the pastor's wives in our care, or new pastor's wives in our area.

I want to pose a question to all of you that are out there reading, "Is this right?"

I have heard many pastor's wives say that you learn from experience. This is true, but can we not have a heart for the young pastor's wives and mentor/coach them along the way - helping them learn valuable lessons before they lose heart and give up?

I truly believe we have a responsibility as leaders to help those following this path of ministry. Will we stand before God and be asked how we helped other women?

Let's be challenged by Elijah and become the Elijah's to the Elisha's in our lives - other women in ministry. Senior Pastor's wives, allow the Holy Spirit to move upon your heart to pass the mantle to women within your care. Do not be closed and afraid of being hurt. Do we not take risks in any relationship we begin developing. No matter what relationship we are in it is inevitable we will be hurt at some point. The important thing is how we handle and deal with the hurt.

I will take it one step further and challenge the Youth Pastor or Associate's wife to be open to learn and glean from what the Senior Pastor's wife has to offer. It is to your detriment that you think you know everything and cannot receive. You will miss out on many blessings God has to give. This is not to say that every Youth Pastor or Associate's wife has an attitude of knowing everything, but I have seen, too often, in my years of ministry, that attitude.

Take advantage of the opportunity to grow and mature under her leadership, if she is willing to open up to you. Learn and seek her council. Allow her the opportunity to share what she has learned from the battlefield.

What about gathering together monthly with the women in leadership in your church. Do fun activities which you all enjoy. You can have an agenda and lesson, but the main thing is to develop relationships so you can be a support to each other. Have another woman in ministry come and speak to your women. The sky is the limit. Use your imagination and see God move in your lives.

If you have suggestions and are doing something that is working write and let me know and we will post it as a resource to others.

We are in this adventure of ministry together, so let's do everything we can to encourage and support one another along the way.

The Ezer Kenegdo Woman

If you have not read the book "Captivating" by John and Stasi Eldredge you need to take the time and read it. One chapter of the book talks about Gen. 1:18; the "helpmeet passage." It is brought out that a better translation is lifesaver alongside. There is sooooo much more, you'll have to read about it.


Being the lifesaver alongside my man motivates me to come alongside my husband and encourage and help him in ministry. We are to complete, not compete. If you feel as if you are to minister as pastor alongside your husband, come into agreement and do the best you can, bringing glory to God. You are not ministering for your own selfworth and glory. You are ministering in that capacity because God desires you to be there.


Another thing we can do as women in ministry is come alongside other in ministry in ministry, as encouragers and supporters. We need each other. My prayer is that we get out of the mindset of keeping things to ourselves - that is dangerous - open up to each other and share your hurts, disappointments and by all means your accomplishments. This is how we help each other. By doing this we will hopefully encourage someone that was ready to give up on ministry, marriage, or life.

Come alongside each other and develop into the women God created each of us to be.

Pastor's Wives Making the "Abishai Choice!"

We read in I Samuel 26:5-8 about David asking who will go with him into the enemy's camp, which was Saul's camp. Abishai stepped up to the plate and said "I will go." He did not have to make that choice, but he did. He was willing to do whatever it took to back his leader up. I would like to challenge the pastor's wife and associate pastor's wife to make an "Abishai choice." Do whatever it takes to be the support you need to be for your fellow pastor's wife. She may be different, have different opinions, may not even want to be involved in ministry as you, but we need to be there for each other.

There are too many pastor's wives suffering from loneliness and isolation. Let's encourage and support each other, because who else is going to give us the support we need. Hopefully as co-laborers together we can understand how the other is feeling, whether it is nervouseness, due to just starting the adventure as a pastor's wife, or a change is about to take place and you aren't ready for it.

Call someone in your area up, get to know them, make the "Abishai choice," become the Abishai she needs.

Have We Let Church Rob Us of Our Passion for Christ?

Here's a thought for each of us in ministry to consider.

"Why did we get into ministry?"

Most likely we felt a "tug" in our spirit; otherwise known as a "calling." At that point in our life we probably had a passion for seeing people get to know Christ and living life to their fullest potential.

But, what happened as we began working in our churches?

Life happened!!!

All the enthusiasm we once had is being sucked out of our lives the more we have to listen to church people criticise our husbands, our kids, and even our self. We can only take so much. I know I have been there. We are excited about ministry. We want to do what we can for the kingdom. We work, work, work. Only to hear, "We can't do ministry that we. We have never done it that way before." I am sure you all have heard that one and many more.

Well, I was challenged tonight about passion. John 15:4,5 talks about bearing fruit, fruit that will last. What fruit are we as pastor's wives bearing? Have we forgotten the call? Are we letting our enemy the devil win a battle. I am not about to let satan win the battle of my calling in my life. I hope you are not willing either. If we give up and let church rob us of our calling and passion then satan has won.

I refuse to let him! I just about did, because I was tired of dealing with people, but God is still beside me encouraging me to go further in Him and bear more fruit.

One way I am going to do that is by encouraging other pastor's wives to hang in there and defeat our enemy. I am here for you. Don't give up! One thing I heard tonight that was so good is this, "There is always more ground to take if you choose to take it." I choose to stay in this race and help others come to know Christ more; that includes pastor's wives and women in ministry who are burnt out and tired.

Restore that passion!

Pray this prayer with me: "Dear God, I am tired and worn out, and don't feel as if I have any more to give. I really don't have any desire to give any more. There has been too many hurts and struggles. I know You love me and are still there for me, I just lost my way a bit. Please forgive me and help me get back on track again. Please, dear Jesus, restore the joy of Your salvation to me. Help me revive my passion for You and sharing You with others. Keep me on track and always guide me back on course when I lose sight of where I should be going. Please send other women my way to help me stay on course and encourage me when I need it the most. Thank you God for caring for me. I love You and will serve You always. In Jesus precious name Amen.

Please write me and let me know what you think. I look forward to hearing what you have to say.

Finding My PTO

Do you have PTO? Personal Time Out is a time set aside specifically for myself, to rejunvenate my spirit. I start each day with my morning 30 minute walk. I enjoy this time because I am able to pray and worship the Lord as I go. Whenever someone passes me I make sure I am not talking or singing so they do not think I am crazy talking to myself. Up until about 3 years ago I found it hard to find this quiet time for myself. It has helped to live near a beach and enjoy the relaxing setting. I have four children , 21, 19, 17, 16, so I need this time to pray for each one and then pray my husband and myself. I treasure this time and look forward to it, even when I don't neccessarily want to get out of bed at 6:45 am.

What are some of the ways you find your PTO? I look forward to hearing what you do.

Recommendations and Endorsements for Cheryl

March 7, 2007

To Whom It May Concern:

It is with great pleasure that I recommend Cheryl Turnbull to minister at your upcoming event. I have enjoyed getting to know her and her husband over the past twenty years.
Cheryl is an intelligent and motivated individual. She is definitely a leader rather than a follower. She has proven her leadership ability by organizing Women’s Ministries, helped lead and organize Women’s Encounters, in addition to being Office Manager at Glad Tidings Church.
She has been Women’s Ministries Representative as well as Missionettes Representative for the Potomac District of the Assemblies of God. She has had many opportunities to speak at women’s and girl’s functions. Her good judgment and sensitivity to the Lord as well as women’s needs and women in ministry are evident in the messages she brings.
Cheryl would be a valuable addition to any event you are planning, and I am happy to give her my wholehearted endorsement.

Sincerely,

Jerry Qualls
Senior Pastor - Glad Tidings Church
Executive Presbyter - Potomac District Council

Cheryl Turnbull is a woman who does an excellent job ministering a biblically based & sound truth right to where the ladies live. Her humor, ministry experience, tender testimony, broken spirit, passion for God and love for women of all ages create a warm atmosphere for God to move in hearts.

I would recommend her ministry as a great benefit to your women and girls.

Linda M. Webb
Women's Ministries Director
POTOMAC DISTRICT COUNCIL
PO Box 690
(14525 John Marshall Highway)
Gainesville, VA 20156
(703) 753-0300
NEW EMAIL ADDRESS: lwebb@potomacag.org


This is a letter to recommend Cheryl Turnbull for ministry. I have known Cheryl for approximately 15 years. She was Women’s Ministries Representative while I was Potomac Women’s Ministries Director. We have worked together in areas of ministry, especially Women's Ministries. She has many gifts and talents and is well trained in ministry. Her good attitude and spirit are very evident as she works with women and girls. If I can provide any further information please feel free to contact me. Donna R. Tatem757-430-8657